12. Oct, 2016

One day!

I know I'm nothing to look at
I know my ass is getting fat
I know I'm feeling sad again
But I do know where I'm at

I know I'm happy deep inside
Way down where no one sees
I know I'm giving up again
But I also know I'm free

Free from pain and suffering
Free from all the woes
Free to do as I choose
I always wanted those

Now I'm at that place again
Now I'm wondering why
Now I'm beating up on myself again
Now I'm wanting to cry

I often find this place I revisit
Whenever there's something good
Happening in my life
I always wondered if I could

One day I'll make it right again
One day I'll give it my all
One day I'll give my heart again
I'll stop feeling like I'm small

I'll begin to scream out loud again
I'll begin to say how I feel
I'll let people into my heart again
I'll begin to keep things real

For now I'll continue to shield my heart
I'll continue to keep the pretence
I'll keep myself from being hurt
I'll stay on my side of the fence

One day I'll smile
One day I'll laugh
Without trying to hide my teeth
One day I'll let you all inside
You'll be allowed to see my underneath

Until that day
I'll hide my smile
I'll stay safe within myself

Until that day
I'll run a mile
Whilst I sit upon the shelf

Written 9/4/2016

Rebecca Henley